Ways to Cheer Up a Friend Who Is Not Dating Anyone

Don't let your friend sit by herself, brooding about her lack of dates.
... Comstock Images/Stockbyte/Getty Images

It's Saturday night and it seems like absolutely everyone is getting ready for their big dates. Everybody, that is, except for one lone friend. When one of your friends isn't dating anyone, cheering her up takes a special blend of compassion, humor and caring. If she feels like the third wheel or odd man -- or woman -- out, help her to see that coupling up isn't the only way to feel love.

1 Pay Attention

Think about the attention that your girl or boyfriend showers on you. If your friend isn't dating anyone, it's possible that he's missing the focus on attention that comes along with a relationship. While you don't have to call, text or talk to him 24-7, you can cheer him up by showing him that his friends are thinking about him. For example, you went out with your girlfriend to see a Sunday afternoon movie while your best bud stayed home by himself. After taking your girl home, switch your focus to your friend and send him a text that says, "How's your day going?" or, "Want to hang out tonight?"

2 Night Out

If your friend is in the dumps because she's alone, take her out for a friends-only activity. It doesn't take a grand gesture to cheer up your friend and show her that you care. Go to a movie, grab dinner at a fancy restaurant -- where your guy would never want to go -- or head to a spa for a day of pampering. Spending time together will take her mind off being dateless and show her that she can have fun without having a significant other.

3 Alone, not Lonely

Being alone -- without a date -- isn't the same as feeling lonely, according to social psychologist Bella DePaulo in her article "National Singles Week: 16 Reasons Why We Need It" on the Psychology Today website. The next time that your best bud moans and groans about his single life, remind him that being alone has its benefits. For example, as a single guy he doesn't have to "check in" with a nightly text and he is free to hang out with the boys whenever he wants.

4 Fix It With a Fix Up

If your friend wants what you have with your guy or isn't having any luck finding a date on her own, consider a fix up. Ask her what she is looking for in a date, not what you think she needs, notes matchmaking guru and reality show star Patti Stanger in the article "How to Fix Up Your Friends" in Allure magazine. Have your friend list the qualities that matter most to her in a guy and consider the possibilities. Fix her up with a guy that you know or ask your boyfriend if he has a friend who might make a match. Send them to dinner together.

Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since 2009. Her articles have appeared in "Pittsburgh Parent Magazine" and the website PBS Parents. She has a Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education.

×