It can be hard to interpret a guy’s feelings toward you -- is his interest romantic or platonic? It can be a mystery at times, but there are some clear signs that could let you know which end of the spectrum you are on. Whether he is outgoing or shy, there are ways to tell if he wants to be more than friends or if you are in the friend zone.
Body Language and Posture
You can gauge a guy’s level of romantic interest in you just by paying attention to his body language. Usually when males are attracted to someone, there will be a shift in their posture, according to psychologist Amit Abraham in “Rules of Attraction.” He will stand up straighter so that he looks taller and manlier. He may even flex his muscles to appear stronger. If he slouches around you and acts like he does around his guy friends, he may see you as one of them and not a potential date.
No Effort to Impress
You may be stuck in the friend zone if you notice that he does not seem to care about impressing you. In fact, he may take advantage of your kindness without bothering to reciprocate. If you are too nice, he may not be romantically interested because he does not feel like has to earn your affection, according to social and personality psychologist Jeremy Nicholson in “Avoiding the Friend Zone: Becoming a Girlfriend or Boyfriend” for "Psychology Today." If he does not seem to be making an effort to win you over, he may not be interested in romantically pursuing you.
No Alone Time
A sign that he is not interested in more than a friendship is if he does not separate you from his group of friends. Has he not made an effort to get you alone, away from the group? If all of your time hanging out is in the company of other people, he may only see you as another one of his friends. He might also try to set you up with somebody else to go on a group date, which could be a real sign that he is not desperate to date you.
Hasn't Made a Move
The most obvious way to tell if a guy only wants to be friends is if he has not indicated any romantic interest and shows no sign of progressing toward a romantic relationship. If you have known him for a while, compare how he acts around you to how he has acted around previous crushes or dates. If he is generally flirty with girls he likes, but does not flirt with you, he probably only wants to be friends. If he tends to ask out his crushes right away but has not asked you out on a date after talking for a certain period of time, you may want to stop waiting for him to make a move.
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