How to Date a Guy Who Has a Female Best Friend
So you have found an attractive guy that seems to have his life moving in the same direction as yours. All of this may sound too good to be true, maybe that is because you found out that his best friend is a girl. This is a delicate territory to enter into. You don't want to be the jealous, threatened girlfriend, but at the same time you don't want to play second fiddle to his BFF. Believe it or not, you can have a successful relationship with a guy whose has a girl for his best friend. While it was once believed that a girl and a boy cannot be just friends, the cultural shift in today's world has changed the way experts look at the boy/girl friendship relationship, explains Linda Sapadin, cited in the Psychology Today article, "Can Men and Women Be Friends?" by Camille Chatterjee.
1 Trust in Him
Trust is considered to be the foundation that any healthy relationship is built on. If there is no trust within the relationship you are not going to be a successful couple, even if your guy didn't have a girl as his best friend. With all that being said, when you date a guy whose best friend is a girl the first thing you need to do is trust in him. Don't let jealousy -- otherwise known as that ugly green monster -- rear its ugly head. Remember, there is a reason why he is not in a dating relationship with his best friend. He wants to date you, not her. Trust him so that you can have a successful relationship.
2 Get to Know His Best Friend
Don't just assume that you do not like his best friend just because she's a girl. Instead, take time to get to know her more. Chances are, if he is needs advice in the relationship department, he will go to her. In turn getting to know his best friend may create an ally in your corner, according to relationship coach Tracey Steinberg, cited in the Cosmopolitan article, "Should You Be Jealous if Your Boyfriend's Best Friend is a Girl?" When you take the time to get to know who she really is you may discover a new friend for yourself, and understand why they are friends in the first place. Men understand that so much more can be brought out of a friendship when you keep it strictly platonic.
3 Watch for Questionable Signs
If you are truly worried that your guy's relationship with his best friend goes a bit further than just friendship, consider any questionable signs. If he seems secretive about his relationship with his friend, or doesn't seem comfortable with talking to you about his and her relationship, you may want to raise a slight flag. Before pointing any fingers and accusing anyone of any wrong doing, share your feelings with him and let him know why you are concerned. While men and woman can definitely just be friends there is a mutual attraction that brought them together as friends. Watching out for the signs can help spare hurt feelings in the end. Chances are you may be reading more into the situation. At least talking with him about your feelings can put your mind at ease.
4 He's Into You, Not Her
If you start to question the relationship between your guy and his friend, or even start to feel insecure about your own relationship, look for signs that he is into you. If he's actively listening to you and making eye contact when you speak, he has your best interests at heart and is smitten with you. Maybe he seems a bit giddy or nervous when you two are together. Don't take that to mean he's hiding something, instead rest assured he's attracted to you and isn't quite sure how to act. By visually being aware of the signs that he's into you, you can ease your worries and concentrate on how to make the best of your relationship with him. Ultimately it breaks down to what Steinberg says that "He chose you, not her -- so believe it."