How to Flirt With Someone That Doesn't Even Have a Clue You Like Him or Her

Get your flirt on!
... Digital Vision./Digital Vision/Getty Images

You may not know where to begin when it comes to flirting with a guy you really like. It can be even more intimidating if he barely notices you begin with. Do nothing and you'll never know what could have been. If has no idea you like him or hardly knows you at all, you've got to get his attention with a little flirting. Flirt with him in a way that makes it clear you are interested, not just because he's cute, but because you think he's an all-around great guy.

Make your presence known. Start finding reasons to be around the guy you like. Make a point to sit next to him in class. Head to the gym when he typically goes. Organize group outings with mutual friends and invite him along. The more you are around him, the greater the chance is that he will notice you.

Beef up the compliments. A friend will compliment a friend every now and then, but if you want him to know you like him, you've got to lay it on a little thick. Find a reason to compliment him every day, but be genuine about it. Compliment a cool shirt, a new haircut, or tell him how that leather jacket makes him look hot. Don't just go for physical compliments however. Let him know you appreciate his intellect too. Congratulate him for getting the high score on the recent calculus exam, or tell him how impressed you are at his deep understanding of modern art.

Get a little touchy-feely with him. Lightly touching a guy when you are talking to them is a major sign of attraction, and this will definitely will get his attention. Touch his arm when he's making a joke. Touch his hand briefly when you are emphasizing a point. Adjust his tie when it is off-kilter, if you are at a dressy event together. Let him catch you gazing at him, and then hold his stare for a moment before you look away. Most importantly, smile at him a lot, which shows you as a happy, positive person that hopefully, he'll want to be around more.

Show a genuine interest in who he is. When you are engaged in conversation with him, don't just stare at him and day dream about your future. Listen to what he is saying. Asking questions shows that you were listening and care about what he has to say. Ask about his interests, his career plans and his opinion on certain matters. Remember what he tells you and follow-up. If he told you that his dog is sick, follow-up a few days later and ask how his dog is doing, or show up with a new dog toy to really get on his radar.

Ask him out. The most obvious way to let him know you like him is to just ask him to hang out or to go on a date. It's a bold move, but one that could also really impress him for the fact that you aren't afraid to go after what you want. You should only consider this once you get to know each other better and you have a hunch he might like you back. Get him alone, make direct eye contact and ask if he would like to go with you somewhere. Be specific and have a time and date already set. If he says yes, you could be on your way towards a budding relationship.

  • If the guy is not responding positively to any of your flirting attempts, back off. You'll save yourself time and embarrassment. Take the time you would have wasted to get over him so that you'll be open to meeting other guys.

Based in Los Angeles, Zora Hughes has been writing travel, parenting, cooking and relationship articles since 2010. Her work includes writing city profiles for Groupon. She also writes screenplays and won the S. Randolph Playwriting Award in 2004. She holds a Bachelor of Arts in television writing/producing and a Master of Arts Management in entertainment media management, both from Columbia College.