Too many times in life, fear holds people back from going after what they want. If your fear is getting the best of you when it comes to approaching a guy you are interested in, he could slip through your fingers without you even getting a chance to say hello. Making the first move to talk to the guy you like is not only an opportunity to get to know him better, you'll also impress him by being bold enough to approach him first. Overcome your anxiety and nerves by building up your confidence and practicing what you want to say.
Work on your confidence. Not only do you need confidence to be able to approach the guy you like, it affects the way he will perceive you. Self-confidence is a reflection of how you see yourself and your abilities. Your confidence will be evident to your crush in the way you approach him -- maintaining eye contact, speaking with a strong voice and having good conversation skills project confidence. Take the time to work on yourself and improve aspects of your life that you might feel less confident about.
Practice with a friend. Enlist the help of a close friend who can help you practice how best to approach the guy you like. That person can give you pointers, reminding you to make eye contact and not to bite your nails like you do when you're nervous. It is ideal if you can practice with another guy, who will be able to give you honest feedback from a male perspective. When you do finally talk to the guy you like, channel how relaxed and comfortable you felt when you were practicing with your guy friend.
Remember that he is only human. Your fear of talking to him could be because you have put him on a pedestal, as if he is perfect and faultless. He is just a guy, no matter how handsome, and he has flaws and insecurities just like everyone else. Bring him back down to earth in your mind and you'll find it a lot easier to approach him.
Figure out when best to approach him. It might be a bit too intimidating to approach him when he's surrounded by his buddies on campus. Consider opportunities where you can catch him alone and he has time to talk. For example, if the two of you frequent a coffee shop and he's always sitting in the same spot studying, you could snag the seat next to him, giving you the perfect opportunity to engage him in a one-on-one conversation.
Make your move with casual conversation. When the time is right and you feel confident, go for it. If the two of you are familiar with each other, approaching him with a simple, "Hey, how's it going?" could be just the start you need for a good conversation. If the two of you do not know each other, but you've had your eye on him for a while, you'll need to come up with an excuse to talk to him. For example, if he's reading a book, you might say, "Excuse me, but is that the latest D. Jones mystery novel? Is it any good?" If he works at the campus bookstore, get him to help you find the books you'll need for next semester and segue into asking him about his classes and his major.
Flirt in a subtle manner. Once you're engaged in conversation, turn on the charm, but be subtle about it. Lightly touching him every now and then, tilting your head or body towards him, leaning in to hear him and playing with your hair are all subtle and flirtatious signs that signal you are definitely interested in him. At this point, he'll hopefully take the hint and ask if you want to hang out sometime, or he may ask you on a formal date. If he seems a bit shy, don't be afraid to initiate a date. If he's interested, he'll definitely take you up on the offer. If he seems uninterested, retreat gracefully with a simple, "It was nice talking to you."
- Don't get down on yourself if he isn't receptive. Chalk it up to a good practice experience for a better guy.
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