How to Nicely Say You're Not Interested

Going on a date when you are uninterested may mean greater heartbreak for your date later on.
... Leonard Mc Lane/Photodisc/Getty Images

Maybe the date is great, but the timing is all off -- or perhaps you simply do not see someone in a romantic light. Learning how to politely decline a date or a relationship is a social skill that can help you soften the blow for the person trying to romance you.

1 Turning Down a Date

Many daters frantically make up excuses to avoid a date, like tests or chores -- but this can leave the other person asking for more dates in the future. You might instead say, "I'm not ready to get into dating," "You are a wonderful person, but I don't feel that way about you" or "I don't feel a connection," suggests writer Maria Fontoura on "Happen," an online magazine from If your suitor continues to ask, stick to brief and direct responses, like "No thank you," or "I'm not interested," advises psychologist Jeremy Nicholson on "Psychology Today" online. In general, keep your refusal civil but also clear and direct.

Candice Coleman worked in the public school system as a middle school and high school substitute teacher. In addition to teaching, she is also a tutor for high school and college students.