What Is a Good Ice Breaker for Texting This Girl I Like?

Be creative with your first text message to break the ice.
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The girl you met at a friend's party gave you her number, and you want to send a text to break the ice. The problem is, you aren't sure what to say to get her attention without scaring her away. Concise and positive text messages usually go over well, as do creative and thoughtful communications that keep you on her mind.

1 Personal Touch

Tailor your first text using information that you already know about her, advises author Abraham Lloyd in the "Marie Claire" article "Does Texting Help or Hurt Romance?" If you know that she loves watching the sunset, send her a picture of the view from your veranda with the message, "Was nice to meet you at the party last week. Thought you would enjoy this spectacular sunset." If she is a fan of Olympic figure skating, send her a fun fact about the sport that you found online. Send a text that shows you are interested in getting to know her better.

2 Text Right Away

The first text you send sets the stage for later communication, so try to be unique to get her attention, says Lloyd. Sometimes this is best accomplished by sending a message right away. For example, when a girl gives you her number, consider sending an immediate message, such as, "Hi, who is that handsome person standing next to you?" Fun and flirty messages like this will keep you on her mind.

3 Common Ground

Think about the situation in which you met the girl and compose a text based on that situation or event. If you met at a party, say something like, "Was nice to meet you at the party last week. I am still thinking about that guacamole dip you made -- where did you find the recipe?" If you take a class together, consider making a comment about an upcoming assignment or test, such as "It was nice to meet you the other day. Studying for history has been brutal so far -- how are you doing?" It's hard to convey emotion by text, says psychologist Art Bowler in the article "Text Etiquette," so save your amorous feelings for the phone or in person.

4 Keep It Simple

When sending an ice breaker text to a girl, consider her reaction when she receives the message. If she is rushed, stressed or in a bad mood, think about whether your text will make her smile or make her feel even worse. Keep the message simple and positive so that she doesn't have to think too much and can quickly understand what you want. For example, say something like, "It was nice to meet you last week. I was wondering what your schedule is like in the next few days, and if you would like to have lunch?" Keep things light and practical when you text, suggests professor Rick Nauert in the Psych Central article "Texting Not Ideal for Serious Relationship Issues," and save the real conversation for when you meet in person.

Arlin Cuncic has been writing about mental health since 2007, specializing in social anxiety disorder and depression topics. She served as the managing editor of the "Journal of Attention Disorders" and has worked in a variety of research settings. Cuncic holds an M.A. in clinical psychology.

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