How to Get Out of a Bad Texting Situation With a Boyfriend

Whether you sent your boyfriend a message meant for someone else or drunk-texted him, a bad texting situation can create a great deal of conflict in your relationship. Your mix-up may have hurt your boyfriend's feelings. Knowing how to deal with the situation appropriately can prevent it from taking a toll on your relationship.

Evaluate the situation. Before you do anything else, find out if your boyfriend is really upset by the text message. You might be making a big deal out of something that did not bother him as much as you think. Ask your boyfriend what he thought about the text or look for clues to see if he is upset with you. If he only seems slightly upset, it might be better to give him time to forget about the whole situation instead of bringing it up.

Offer your boyfriend a sincere apology for the text message. In his "Psychology Today" article "The Five Ingredients of an Effective Apology," psychologist and author Guy Winch recommends that every apology include a clear "I'm sorry" message, a display of regret for the actions committed, acknowledgement that what you did was wrong, empathy for how your actions made the other person feel and a request for forgiveness. Giving an apology that is heartfelt, honest and remorseful will help your boyfriend accept the fact that you made a mistake and it probably won't happen again. Show your boyfriend that you understand his feelings and regret having hurt him that way.

Have a conversation about what is and what is not acceptable when it comes to texting. If you accidentally texted an affectionate message meant for someone else that made him jealous, have a discussion about trust and what makes him uncomfortable when it comes to communicating with others. Establish clear boundaries about texting in your relationship. If he seems to be upset because you don't make it a habit to answer your texts regularly, reach an agreement that will work for both of you, such as you will make it a point to communicate with him at the end of the day if you haven't had time to answer his texts.

Plan ahead so that you don't end up in a situation like this again. Avoid situations in which you can end up sending a hurtful text. If you're old enough to drink, ask one of your buddies to keep an eye on you and stop you if she sees that you are drunk texting. Don't send messages when you are distracted to avoid sending it to the wrong person. Abstain from sending messages when you are upset or angry. Instead, wait until you cool off to ensure that you're messages are logical and mature.