What to Say When You First Meet a Girl
There's a girl down the block who has caught your eye, though the two of you have never met. One day, both of you arrive at the community mailbox at the same time -- and you find yourself tongue-tied. If you aren't sure what to say to a girl when you first meet, try doing a bit of prep work to ensure you feel confident and make the best impression possible when the time comes.
1 Keep It Simple
Sometimes the simplest introduction is the best. If you don't know the girl's name, offer an outstretched hand and say "Hi, my name is Jason. What's yours?" Hopefully the girl will respond with a friendly smile and offer you her name. In a situation in which you are being introduced by someone else, express your happiness over meeting her. Be sure your body language is open and matches what you are saying; maintain good eye contact, for instance. Your only goal should be to convey that you are happy to meet and interested to talk.
2 Make Small Talk
Have a plan for making small talk before you find yourself meeting a girl for the first time. Keeping on top of the news, current events, popular culture and even local happenings will give you something to discuss, says psychology professor Susan Krauss Whitbourne, in the Psychology Today article "10 Tips to Talk About Anything With Anyone." For example, after you introduce yourself to the girl down the street, say something like "I got this note in the mail about the video dance party in town this weekend. Have you heard about it?" Try to choose something relevant to the situation that you are in, thus making it easier to transition from your introduction.
3 Be Interested
If possible, do a bit of detective work ahead of time if you know that you will be meeting a girl, advises Whitbourne. For example, if you know you will be introduced to a mutual friend at a party, find out what you might have in common ahead of time. When your best friend Jake brings Alicia over for the introduction, you will be ready to say "Nice to meet you. I heard that you are on the school swim team. How do you like the practices?" When you show interest and ask questions, you may find that the rest of the conversation unfolds naturally.
4 Make Her Laugh
Poking fun at yourself is a surprisingly good way to present yourself in an attractive light, according a 2008 study conducted in part by University of New Mexico anthropologist Gil Greengross and published in Evolutionary Psychology. The study showed that use of self-deprecating humor made confident people appear more attractive. Try this out on the girl down the street by saying "I would go to the dance, but I've been told I have two left feet." If she laughs, it is a good sign that she might be interested in getting to know you more.
- 1 American Psychological Association: 6 Tips for Making a Good Impression
- 2 Psychology Today: 10 Tips to Talk About Anything With Anyone
- 3 Small Talk, Big Results: 7 Tips on Using Humor in Conversation
- 4 Evolutionary Psychology: Dissing Oneself versus Dissing Rivals: E ffects of Status, Personality, and Sex on the Short-Term and L ong-Term Attractiveness of Self-Deprecating and Other-Deprecating Humor