How to Cope With the Loneliness of a Long-Distance Relationship

Surprise each other with occasional gifts.
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While many couples manage to make long-distance love work, this kind of relationship comes with many challenges. Loneliness is a common problem when you and the one you love are separated by miles. If left unattended, you might begin to feel abandoned by your partner, or that the relationship has lost its spark. Fortunately, several strategies can help you keep your romance interesting and your mood positive despite the challenge of long-distance love.

1 Focus on Others

While you want to keep in touch with your partner through regular video chats, don't restrict your social needs to him. Reach out to others around you, suggests clinical social worker Brock Hansen in the PsychCentral article, "10 More Ideas to Help With Loneliness." Mingle with people around campus who share your interests. For example, if you're a fan of comic books, look for comic book clubs at your school or where you live. Also make it a point to focus on the good deeds you can do for those around you, suggests Hansen. Start with greeting everyone with a smile.

2 Focus on You

Acknowledge the opportunities and advantages to long-distance relationships, suggests Margarita Tartakovsky in the article, "7 Tips for Long-Distance Couples," on PsychCentral. For example, you can spend more time working on your own personal hobbies and goals with less of a distraction. Set new fitness goals so you can show off in front of your partner during your next meeting. Learn to cook new dishes for yourself and your partner in the future. In addition, remember to spend time with friends and family members you haven't seen in a while. They can offer social distractions from your loneliness.

3 Have a Plan

Keep plans to reunite with your partner in mind, suggests Tartakovsky. For example, perhaps you plan to meet up for a visit in a few weeks. Together, brainstorm all the activities you can do when the day finally arrives. You can also have more long-term plans, such as moving in together once you're no longer apart. Knowing that you will soon be with the person you love can take the edge off the loneliness and give you both something to work toward.

4 Send Gifts

Surprise each other by sending gifts, suggests relationship therapist Terri Orbuch in the Huffington Post article, "Going Long-Distance? 8 Essentials to Help Your Relationship Thrive." On special occasions send her a piece of jewelry or handcrafted trinkets. On other days, simply send a romantic letter or email. You don't have to do this every day. Try to space out these little surprises to keep your partner on her toes.

Mitch Reid has been a writer since 2006. He holds a fine arts degree in creative writing, but has a persistent interest in social psychology. He loves train travel, writing fiction, and leaping out of planes. His written work has appeared on sites such as and GlobalPost, and he has served as an editor for ebook publisher Crescent Moon Press, as well as academic literary journals.