How Can I Talk My Mom Into Letting Me Hang Out With My Girlfriend?

Some moms discourage their children from hanging out with their girlfriends.
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So you want to hang out with your girlfriend, but your mom says no. Times have changed a lot since your mom was a teenager. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics in the article "When To Let Your Teenager Start Dating," the average age to start dating is now 13 1/2 for boys and 12 1/2 for girls. The trend for younger teens is to date in a group setting rather than one-on-one. If your mom is not even comfortable with such group dates, however, you might be able to get her approval by talking to her and letting her learn more about your girlfriend.

Ask your mom why she doesn't want you to hang out with your girlfriend. Does she feel the relationship is inappropriate or unhealthy? Does she not like your girlfriend? Is she concerned that no one will be supervising the two of you and things could go too far?

Talk to your mom about her concerns. By having a conversation instead of an argument, you may be able to reassure her that she has no reason to worry. Depending on the issue, you may or may not be able to change her mind about letting you spend time with your girlfriend.

Find ways to help your mom get to know your girlfriend better if she has concerns about her character. Maybe she can join your family for dinner or come along during a family outing. Hopefully, if your mom spends some time around her, she will see her good qualities and let the two of you hang out more. You can also introduce your mom to her family so she will feel better about letting you hang out at your girlfriend's house.

See if your mom is okay with you and your girlfriend hanging out with a group if she is worried about the two of you being alone. Many young teens enjoy socializing with other teens who may or may not be couples. Let your mom know when some friends are planning on getting together for a school activity, movie or party to see if your girlfriend can join.

  • Do not go against your mom's wishes and see your girlfriend behind her back. If she finds out, you will probably be in a lot of trouble and it will be even more difficult to spend time with your girlfriend in the future.
  • When your mom does let you hang out with your girlfriend, be sure to follow her rules and be home on time.

Sharon O'Neil has been writing professionally since 2008. Her work has been published on various websites, including Walden University's Think+Up. She has worked in international business and is a licensed customs broker. She is currently a supervisor with a social service agency that works with families to prevent child abuse and neglect. She obtained a Bachelor of Science in business from Indiana University.