How to Tell a Boy You Have a Crush on Him

Devise a game plan before approaching him about your feelings.
... Comstock/Stockbyte/Getty Images

Telling your crush that you have feelings for him can bring emotions of excitement and love, self-consciousness and fear. Before you tell him you like him, make sure you know enough about him to verify your feelings. Once you are ready to have your conversation, remember to keep the discussion relaxed and easy going so as not to make him nervous.

Invite your crush to hang out with your friends. Socializing with friends will help you learn more about his personality, likes and dislikes. This may give you insight about how to approach him, as well as other useful information, such as whether he is involved with someone else or has recently gone through a break-up.

Practice what you are going to say before you say it. Write it down on a piece of paper and read it out loud. Communication is everything. Express your feelings in a cohesive way that shows him you are mature and ready to take the next step.

Have your conversation in a casual environment. It will take the pressure off both of you. Ask your crush to an ice cream parlor after school or take a walk to enjoy the fresh air. Save serious topics for later, when you begin to know each other on a deeper level.

Calm potential nerves with relaxation exercises found on the Luther College website [see references]. Find a private place. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth several times. Tilt your head side to side and roll it in a circle. Shrug your shoulders up toward your ears. Hold them for several seconds and drop them down. Repeat this several times. Loosen your muscles by rolling your shoulders forward and backward.

Get straight to the point. If you avoid the reason you asked him to talk, the expectation will make him anxious. Explain your feelings. For example, "I like being around you because of your sense of humor." Smile often during the conversation. Sincere compliments will let him know that you are attracted to him for more than his appearance.

Leave the conversation open-ended. Tell him you would like to hang out, but encourage him to call if he wants to discuss it further. Put the ball in his court. This will give him the chance to think about what you have said with no pressure to give an immediate response.

  • If your crush tells you he isn't interested, take time to heal from the rejection. If you feel depressed, seek out a trusted adult to talk about your feelings.

Ashley K. Alaimo is a writer, blogger and certified teacher in New York. She has a master's degree in elementary education and early childhood education from Medaille College, as well as a bachelor's degree in music and theater from Buffalo State College. Alaimo has also worked as an education specialist with ages birth to 12 years old, creating classroom and enrichment curriculum for various early childhood centers.