How to Not Be Intimidated by Beauty

Don't let her looks make you squirm.
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She's got super model good looks, he's a Ryan Gosling look-alike, and you feel drastically dull in comparison. If you're intimidated by someone else's beauty, you can overcome your feelings of inadequacy. Think about the saying, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder," and consider the possibility that another person's pretty pout or handsome face aren't any better than your own.

1 Boost Your Confidence

Bump up your own confidence level, making the intimidation factor decrease as your self-esteem builds. Thinking negative thoughts about yourself, setting unrealistic expectations and focusing on perfection can all lower your self-esteem, according to the article "How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem" on the TeensHealth website. Instead of thinking, "She's so pretty. I could never measure up," focus your energy on your good points. For example, make a mental list of your positive features such as your thick, curly hair or your straight-A intelligence.

2 Accept What You Can't Change

The guy who caught your eye has major movie star looks, making you feel completely intimidated. Instead of stressing that you aren't attractive enough to even talk to him, recognize what you can -- and can't -- change about yourself and the situation. You can change your attitude, but you can't change your own appearance or his behaviors. For example, if he acts aloof and cold toward you because he has a super-sized ego, you can either feel nervous around him or ignore his actions.

3 Consider Their View

Just because you're intimidated by someone else's beauty doesn't mean that she has the same feelings about herself. You aren't the only one out there who feels unattractive at times or thinks that other people look better. Even the most beautiful woman can have low self-esteem or a distorted self-image, according to clinical psychiatrist Dale Archer in his article "The Psychology of Beauty" on the Psychology Today website. When you start feeling less than adequate next to the seemingly perfect supermodel type, keep in mind that she may not see herself as beautiful. Reminding yourself that everyone has her own insecurities makes the "beautiful people" a bit less intimidating.

4 Be Assertive

Along with picking your self-confidence up, acting in an assertive way can help you get over your feelings of intimidation. Don't let someone else's appearance make you feel like you don't count. When you're around that strikingly chiseled face or perfect body, avoid shrinking into the background like the wallflower that you're not. Stand up for yourself, using an assertive approach. Instead of keeping quiet around that beautiful person or letting him take charge of the conversation, remember that you have an equal right when it comes to speaking your mind.

Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since 2009. Her articles have appeared in "Pittsburgh Parent Magazine" and the website PBS Parents. She has a Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education.

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