Being single can be a lonely experience. Many Christian women are tired of being single and desire to attract the right Christian man. They soon realize, however, that finding that man is not an easy task. Discontent with singleness may cause a woman to attract the wrong kind of man. To attract the right Christian man, a woman must begin by being the right kind of Christian herself, and she must rely on God to fill the void until the right man presents himself.
Be spiritually mature. Spiritually mature Christians have a deep relationship with God that allows them to identify the right Christian man when he comes along. One of the roles of the Holy Spirit is to lead and guide the Christian. Feed your soul with daily Bible study and prayer so you can hear the Spirit speak.
Be content with your singleness. Don’t be desperate for marriage. Lori Smith, author of "The Single Truth," says that being content is being satisfied with what you already have. It doesn’t mean you don’t want something better, but that you are content to wait until God gives it to you.
Abstain from sex before marriage. In the book “The Ten Commandments of Dating,” the authors point out that sex does not equal intimacy. Sex outside of marriage reduces intimacy rather than building it. Give the relationship time to grow. The right Christian man will have the same view about sex outside of marriage that God does.
Get a life. Don’t spend all your time waiting for that next relationship or worrying about whether your current relationship will lead to marriage. The right Christian man will be attracted to a Christian woman who has a full, vibrant life outside of her relationship with a man.
Set boundaries. Part of attracting the right Christian man is saying no when you encounter the wrong man. Set appropriate boundaries regarding respect and mistreatment to discourage undesirable men. In the book “Boundaries in Dating,” the authors recommend setting clear limits and boundaries early in the relationship so that there will be no confusion down the line about what you expect from a man.
- “Boundaries in Dating”; Henry Cloud, et al.; 2000
- “The Ten Commandments of Dating”; Ben Young, et al.; 1999
- “The Single Truth”; Lori Smith; 2002
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