How to Convince Your Mom to Let You Go Out With Your Boyfriend

Be open and honest with your mom about your reasons and feelings.
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There really isn't any trick or special technique that you can use to get your mom to let you go out with your boyfriend. In fact, if you resort to tactics such as begging and nagging, copping an attitude or throwing a fit when she doesn't allow it, you'll only decrease her chances of saying "yes" anytime soon. The key is to not only show, but really prove to your mom, that you are mature, responsible and trustworthy enough to go out on a healthy and safe date with your boyfriend.

Demonstrate that you are mature, responsible and capable of making good decisions. Keep up with your school responsibilities. Do your daily chores without your mom having to remind you. Be back home on time after hanging out with friends. Stay out of trouble, and be a good role model for younger siblings. Chances are Mom will take notice of these things, but if she doesn't, you can recall these instances to gently remind her later of all the ways you are mature and responsible.

Give your mom the opportunity to get to know your boyfriend and see him for the great guy that he is. Get Mom's permission to invite him to family gatherings, or include him in a family game night at your house.

Communicate openly and appropriately with your mom about the topic. Don't ask her if you can go out with your boyfriend tomorrow night as you're running to catch the bus and she's helping your brother get dressed in the morning. Instead, schedule a time to chat with her. Say something like, "Hey Mom, can we sit down at the table and talk after dinner tonight?" This way, you can both make the time and give each other your undivided attention. She'll appreciate your thoughtfulness, maturity and willingness to open up to her. When you do sit down to chat, remain calm, explain why you want to go out with your boyfriend, give your mom details about the date and be willing to listen to what she has to say about it.

Establish a safety plan so that your mom knows you are responsible enough to be trusted out on your own with your boyfriend. Let your mom know what your limits are, how you will say "no" to anything you might not be ready or allowed to do and who you will contact if things become uncomfortable for you. Let her know you will keep cash, your cellphone and charger and your house keys on you at all times during the date in case you need to leave quickly for any reason.

Plan a date that will give your mom peace of mind while you're on it. Make arrangements to go somewhere where the two of you won't be isolated, such as a movie theater or a friend's house. Or, go on a double date with a friend so your mom knows you're in the company of other trusted people in your life. Be willing to compromise if she suggests a particular time or place for the date.

Respect her decision, no matter what it is. If your mom decides that the time isn't right, accept her decision maturely. Give it a little time, and try to talk to her about it again after a few weeks.

Debra Pachucki has been writing in the journalistic, scholastic and educational sectors since 2003. Pachucki holds a Bachelor's degree in education and currently teaches in New Jersey. She has worked professionally with children of all ages and is pursuing a second Masters degree in education from Monmouth University.

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