Do you know a man who has no friends? You might be puzzled as to why this person chooses to go through life friendless. There are a variety of reasons -- not all of which are by choice. He may be fearful, distrustful, or he may just prefer time alone. Learning more about a man and his unique situation is the only way to know for sure why a man lacks friendships in his life.
Shy and Anxious
A man who has no friends may be socially anxious, lacking social skills, or naturally introverted, says psychologist Irene Levine in the "Psychology Today" column "Why Would Someone Have No Friends?" A man with social anxiety fears being embarrassed in front of others or that he will be negatively judged. Many men with social anxiety also lack social skills because they have not had the opportunity to practice relating to others. Introversion, on the other hand, is a personality type -- men who are introverted gain strength from time spent alone and dwindle in social settings.
There may also be psychological reasons why a man may have no friends, says Levine. A man who was bullied often during childhood may have trouble trusting others -- and difficulty forming friendships. The same man may cope with his own feelings of insecurity and anxiety by acting pushy and trying to control others -- both of which will drive other people away. Still some men suffer with mental health issues such as personality disorders that make it hard to maintain relationships.
Perhaps he has changed residences a lot in the past and did not have proper time to develop friendships. He may also live in an area that does not make friendships easy -- such as a remote rural location or a spot without many people his own age. Frequent moves and isolation can leave anyone feeling like an outsider. Unless a man has excellent social skills and a naturally outgoing personality, he may suffer with a lack of friendships as a result of his circumstances.
Goals Come First
Some men focus on other goals in life -- such as education, money and power -- to the exclusion of friendships. Todd Kashdan, a professor of psychology at George Mason University, argues in the "Psychology Today" article "Why Do Men Have a Hard Time Making Friends?" that most men are not as skilled as women at developing deep friendships because they do not value relationships as much. As the saying goes, it is lonely at the top. Unfortunately, most men don't realize that what they may be missing are friendships they set aside to achieve their goals.
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