You may wonder why getting along with your parents has become more difficult, and when and how they changed. Well, your parents are probably thinking something quite similar about you at this very moment. Everyone, including parents, continue to develop and change throughout adulthood. Your parents may continue to hold a perception of you that differs from the individual you are now -- and the result can be problematic for all. When your parents get on your nerves, consider these strategies to minimize the aggravation.
Seeing the World Differently
When others demonstrate a viewpoint that is very different from our own, it is easier to feel annoyed than if their ideas closely resembled ours. The next time your parents say something that makes you feel, well, nutty, remember that you hold different perspectives. You don’t have to agree with their perspective, but you can acknowledge and respect where your parents’ ideas originate. Knowledge is power. It provides understanding, and a reason not to simply put on your headphones and walk away.
Here Today, Gone Tomorrow
Remember the temporary status of your current living arrangement when your nerves are frazzled. Going to college, or going to work will open the door to a whole new world of freedom for you, as well as responsibility. Perhaps you feel that the time can’t come soon enough, but it will be here sooner than you imagine. In the meantime, try to imagine what your first experience of independent living might look like, and what a typical day may entail.
Put It on Paper
When your parents get on your nerves, the stress may create negative feelings that influence your actions and words. You will feel better when the negative feelings have a new place to hang out besides your head. You can accomplish this goal by writing about your feelings in a journal. It’s easier to process feelings like anger and frustration when the feelings appear on paper. Try journaling your feelings the next time you sense growing frustration with your parents.
Talk About It
Your parents may not have a clue that their behavior causes you grief – seriously, so clue them in about your feelings. Consider talking with your parents, and explain how you feel. You’ll want your parents to respond with kindness and respect, so use a similar tone as you share your feelings with honesty and kindness. Resist the temptation to argue, and remember to listen to what your parents have to say.
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