When parents announce a separation, it is difficult for the children to understand. When parents remain in the same home during a separation, children may experience additional feelings of confusion. Through effective communication and maintaining as much normalcy as possible, you can thrive during this tumultuous time. Talk with your parents and other loved ones about how the separation is affecting you and what you need in order to understand and work through the situation.
Stay the Course
If your parents are living together as their marriage dissolves, do your best to maintain your everyday routine, advises the Kidtips article "Divorce: Putting the Children First." Your parents may be living together to ease the impact of the separation on the family. Keep up your routines: Spend time relaxing with your friends as usual. Participate in the same hobbies or activities that you usually enjoy. Over time, the dynamics of your household will settle down.
Voice Your Feelings
When a couple separates, both parties have hurt feelings, which may temporarily override parents' concern for their children. You may need to sit down and voice your feelings to your parents. Separated parents can put their children first, says marriage and family therapist Jane Greer in her Huffington Post article "The Unselfish Divorce: Separating but Living Together." Your parents need to hear your feelings and thoughts in order to do what is in your best interest.
Do Not Take It Personally
Your parents are divorcing because of issues with their relationship, which is separate from the relationship each parent has with you. If your parents are living together while separated, you may hear some arguing, which is normal for a divorcing couple, advises divorce attorney and life coach Lee Borden in his article "Living Together after Divorce." Remind yourself that your parents are evolving from a married couple to a separated couple that co-habitats. If the interaction between your parents becomes too bothersome, it may be time to speak your mind.
In any separation, everyone involved experiences a wealth of emotions. During a crisis or traumatic situation like a separation, it is typical for children to draw strength from their parents and family, says social worker James Lehman in the article "The Do's and Don'ts for Divorced Parents." Spend quality time with each parent to help one another deal with this tough time. Spending quality time together may also help you understand why your parents are separating and remaining in the same home.
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