How to Convince Your Parents to Let You Go Over to a Friend's House

Talk to your parents when you are all relaxed and calm.
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You've been texting your friend all week, planning a great night of fun over at her house this weekend. That's the easy part. Now you have to convince your parents to let you go over there. If you're lucky, you already have open lines of communication with your folks. In any case, think about how to approach the subject at a time and in a way that maximizes the chances they'll be receptive to your request.

Demonstrate to your parents that you are responsible, trustworthy and mature enough to handle additional freedoms and privileges. Do your chores around the house without being asked, keep up your grades in school, follow house rules and come home from activities on time. This type of behavior makes it more likely your parents will be willing to listen to your request to go to your friend's house because you've already demonstrated you are making good choices and being responsible. On the flip side, if you've just gotten in trouble with this same friend, had problems at another friend's house or shown poor judgment in another area, it's probably not the best time to ask for permission to go to your friend's house.

Approach your parents at a time when they are relaxed, not busy with other important activities and have the time to talk -- if they're in the middle of a huge project or have just walked in the door after a long day at work, that's not a good time. Talk to them when you're doing the dishes together after dinner or relaxing in the family room later on. Don't jump right into begging to go to your friend's house. Instead, calmly point out recent positive developments in your behavior and ways you've shown greater responsibility. Thank them for the privileges you have recently been given. Then lead into the subject at hand: Tell them you have gotten to be good friends with Susie and you'd like the opportunity to spend more time together.

Present a specific request, such as asking if you could please go over to Susie's house Friday evening to watch movies together, or on Saturday afternoon to hang out, give each other mani-pedis and cook dinner together. Be prepared for the questions you know they will ask, such as whether her parents will be there and what movies you plan to watch. You will improve your chances of getting to go if you have had your friend over to your house before so your parents will have had the chance to meet her and get to know her.

Remain calm if they say "no" at first. Calmly ask what concerns they have about you going over to your friend's house. Ask them respectfully what type of things you could do to help them feel more comfortable with allowing you to go to Susie's. For example, suggest she could come over to your house this coming weekend for a movie night or a family meal so your parents could get to know her and see that you and your friend can be trusted to follow the rules and get along with the family. Such steps might help change their initial "no" to an eventual "yes."

As a national security analyst for the U.S. government, Molly Thompson wrote extensively for classified USG publications. Thompson established and runs a strategic analysis company, is a professional genealogist and participates in numerous community organizations.Thompson holds degrees from Wellesley and Georgetown in psychology, political science and international relations.