Things to Say When You Have Not Heard From a Friend

Writing a friend can give you time to think over your words -- and anything that may have caused the silence.
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Maybe you have fallen out of contact with a friend -- or you are talking to or seeing a friend again after a notable absence. Fortunately, you can get your pal talking again or reconnect after not speaking for a long time.

1 When Your Friend Is Still Out of Contact

Maybe your friend is busy with other aspects of his life -- or a disagreement has convinced him to stop contacting you. In that case, a handwritten letter, an email or a phone call could give you the opportunity to address it. You might say, "I have noticed that we aren't talking much lately. I think I may have done something to cause this. I hope we can talk about it." If you know why your friend has gone silent, you might instead say, "I regret what I said to you. It was foolish and I don't feel that way. I hope we can move forward with our friendship."

2 When Reconnecting

When seeing a friend after a long absence, avoid assigning blame for the silence. Instead, talk about what you have been doing. You might ask about classes your friend is taking or hobbies she is getting into. Giving a compliment -- taking note of a new haircut or a new shirt -- can also go a long way in moving the friendship forward again.

Candice Coleman worked in the public school system as a middle school and high school substitute teacher. In addition to teaching, she is also a tutor for high school and college students.

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