What Does It Mean When You're Really Attached to Your Boyfriend?

As feelings grow, you may want to spend more time with your boyfriend.
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Wanting to spend all your time together or calling him when you get home every night are just a few signs that you’re attached to your boyfriend. You may be comfortable with this level of attachment or you’re worried that you’re becoming overly attached. Looking at the meaning behind your attachment can help you remain comfortable and maintain a healthy relationship with your boyfriend.

1 You're Having Trust Issues

Jealousy or lack of trust can make you become really attached to your boyfriend. Being unsure of your his feelings can make you feel unsafe in the relationship, which results in clinginess, according to psychologist Lisa Firestone in the Psychology Today article “How Your Attachment Style Impacts Your Relationship.” If you’re strongly attached because of trust issues, communicate these issues to your boyfriend instead of opting for the temporary fix of always being around him.

2 You're Finding Your Comfort Zone

Starting a new relationship can be exciting, but it can also take time to settle into a comfortable groove with your boyfriend. You may find yourself attached to him because you’re unsure of how to maintain your own identity while developing as a new couple. Spending a great deal of time together is how many define their relationship as a close one, as Firestone notes. If you’re increasingly attached because you’re forcing closeness in your new relationship, focus on naturally developing this bond through open, honest communication.

3 Your Feelings Are Growing Stronger

As your relationship develops, you may begin to feel like you’re falling in love. These intense feelings can make you want to talk to your boyfriend constantly and spend all of your free time together. Feelings of love during this time can include an attraction that is intense and difficult to sort out, according to the “Love and Romance” article on the Teens Health website. If your attachment seems to stem from deepening feelings, make sure you’re moving at a pace that allows adequate time for each of you to get adjusted to your current stage of commitment and make sure you are ready for the next stage. Doing this will give you the chance to sort out your feelings and help your relationship remain close without being unhealthy.

4 You're Avoiding Something Else

Things may be stressful or tough in your life, which can cause you to spend time with the person who makes you feel happiest. You also might enjoy spending so much time with your boyfriend because it helps you avoid dealing with issues outside of your relationship. During this time in your life, romantic relationships can be a source of social support, notes psychologist Carl Pickhardt in the Psychology Today article "Adolescence and Falling In Love." If you’re feeling very attached to your boyfriend because you don’t want to deal with your personal issues, it might be time to look for another solution. You should feel comfortable sharing the stressful parts of your life with your boyfriend and trusting him to be there for you, but it is also important to address your problems and avoid turning your relationship into an escape.

Based in Chicago, Nicole Nalls has been writing and editing career and education-related articles since 2008. Her articles have appeared in "Venus Zine" magazine, as well as a number of online publications. She holds a Bachelor of Science in sociology from Illinois State University.