How to Be Sure That Your Boyfriend Is Honest
When you're in an intimate relationship, you expect your boyfriend to be open and honest with you. However, that's not always the case. Your boyfriend may say something or do something that makes you question his honesty. There's no way to be certain that your boyfriend is honest with you, but you can watch for signs that may indicate he is lying to you.
1 Body Language
Your boyfriend's body language can be an indication of whether or not he is being honest with you. A normal reaction for someone telling a lie is a wish to hide it, according to Philip Houston, Michael Floyd and Susan Carnicero, all former CIA officers, cited in the article "Signals That You're Being Lied To" on the AARP website. For example, if your boyfriend is lying to you, he may cover his mouth with his hand or he may obscure his eyes. When someone is not telling the truth, his pupils will dilate and he will blink more frequently, says Terri Orbuch, a professor of sociology at Oakland University and author of "Signs Your Partner is Lying" on the Psychology Today website. Another sign that your partner may be lying is an inability to sit still. He may fidget, pace or pick at something.
2 Actions and Words
If your boyfriend is being honest with you, his verbal messages and body language should tell you the same thing. Often, when someone is lying, his words might sound convincing, but his body language may indicate a lie. An honest man will follow through on what he says, says Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz, both therapists and authors of "Is Your Man Someone You Can Trust?" on the Your Tango website.
3 Responding to a Question
A person who is lying will often repeat your question or reply with a statement that does not answer the question, according to Houston, Floyd and Carnicero. For example, if you ask your boyfriend if he was at his friend's party, he might reply, "Really -- was I at Andy's party?" or "I was wondering if you were going to ask me that." These types of responses give a dishonest boyfriend time to formulate a lie. A pause before answering a question that shouldn't take any thought can also be an indication of a lie. Trying to change the subject can also be a sign that your boyfriend isn't being honest.
4 Other Considerations
Pay attention to how your boyfriend normally behaves. A behavior that can point to an indication of lying could be normal behavior for him. For example, he could have a nervous personality and regularly fidget or he could regularly pause before giving an answer to a question. Also, be careful not to prematurely accuse your boyfriend of lying. If you see one or two indications that he could be lying, they may be insignificant, Orbuch says.