My Girlfriend Dumped Me Because She Considers Me More as a Friend

Talk to a friend about your post-breakup feelings.
... BananaStock/BananaStock/Getty Images

The two of you had fun-filled dates, shared your inner-most thoughts and enjoyed almost all of the same things. Even though your relationship was seemingly ideal, your girlfriend broke up with you. Why would such a well-matched couple split? She said that you're more of a "friend" to her than anything more. After the breakup you need to decide what to do next and how to handle what's left of your relationship with her.

1 Chemistry Connection

A successful romantic relationship takes a mix of attraction, closeness and commitment, asserts TeensHealth, in the article "Love and Romance." Without one of these ingredients, your relationship will suffer and possibly end. When your girlfriend says that she's dumping you because she considers you as only a friend, she's likely lost one of these relationship components: attraction. Without the spark of electricity or the chemistry of attraction, the relationship will slide from romantic to platonic.

2 You vs. Her

What happens when she's lost that special spark for you, but your romantic fire is still burning strong? If she dumps you, saying that the two of you work better as friends, pushing the point isn't likely to help. While some relationships can rekindle after a lull, getting the initial attraction back isn't exactly easy. It's possible that the two of you have grown apart or that her needs have changed. Even though accepting the breakup is a challenge, you need to respect her wishes and move on with your own life. If you're struggling to go from romantic to platonic, ask for help or support from your family or other close friends.

3 Become Friends

Just because your girlfriend dumps you doesn't mean that your relationship has to end there. Unlike a relationship that ends because one partner lies, cheats or completely loses interest, your now-ex left you because she thought that the two of you made better friends than romantic partners. Therefore, while the romance is over, you can continue on as friends if you like. Keep in mind that you need time to heal before heading in to the friendship part of your relationship. Avoid jumping into a friendship immediately after the breakup.

4 Moving On

When your ex says, "Well, I dumped you because we are better friends, so let's just stay that way," it may mean that she isn't completely ready to let go yet. Even though she's the one who initiated the breakup, she may still feel some connection to you or have anxiety about being on her own. If you feel that staying friends with her prevents you from moving on, don't go down that road. While you might not want to completely break ties with your ex, doing so can help you to get on with your life and over her.

Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since 2009. Her articles have appeared in "Pittsburgh Parent Magazine" and the website PBS Parents. She has a Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education.

×