How to Know When You Have Fallen Out of Love
Relationships go through phases and you may find yourself in a place where you are questioning your feelings. You could have fallen out of love or maybe you’re in a stage where you need to rekindle the spark. Examine your feelings and the situation to see where you are at to figure out whether you should move on or if there is still something there you want to save.
1 You Don't Like Being Together
When you can’t stand to be around your boyfriend or girlfriend -- that's a sign that you are not in love anymore. This could be caused by arguments and disagreements that led to resentment. If you and your significant other seem to be walking on eggshells to avoid a fight, this could take away from the intimacy of the relationship and can lead to resentment and growing apart. If you find yourself avoiding your boyfriend more than wanting to be with him, it may be a sign that you should end the relationship, according to psychotherapist Kimberly Moffit in the article, "5 Signs You've Fallen Out of Love" on "Canadian Living."
2 You're Pushing Away Affection
You should not feel repulsed by the thought of showing affection to your girlfriend. Nor should you push away affection from your girlfriend. If your feelings toward her have changed drastically compared with how you felt in the beginning of the relationship, this is a sign that you are not in love with her anymore. An example could be that you didn’t return a kiss or a hug, or maybe you pushed her away when she tried to touch you. Physical attraction is important in a relationship, and if you feel grossed out by your girlfriend's affection, then you are not in a healthy, loving relationship, according to Moffit.
3 You're Questioning Future and Past
If you have no interest in thinking about the future of your relationship -- whether casually planning what you will be doing next week or envisioning the next year together -- you may not be invested enough to care about whether you stay together or not. This could be a troubling sign that you do not love your boyfriend enough to be excited about planning the time together. Another sign that points to falling out of love is if you look back to the beginning of the relationship, and you cannot figure out what attracted you to your boyfriend in the first place. Usually, when people are falling out of love and hope to save the relationship, they will remind themselves of the good times in the relationship and try to rekindle that honeymoon phase. If you cannot recall the "good times" or cannot envision those loving feelings coming back, you may not be able to salvage your relationship.
4 You're Looking for Love Elsewhere
You might not be getting the love that you want from your partner and you might be looking for it elsewhere, whether it be through flirting with strangers, fantasizing about fictional characters or even full-on cheating. This may be the reason why you are falling out of love, but it could also be an indicator that you have emotionally checked out of your relationship and are already looking for something new, according to psychologist Susan Heitler in "Are You Falling Out of Love? A Quiz on 10 Warning Signs" on "Psychology Today."