Do I Tell My Boyfriend I'm Thinking About My Ex?

It's not always a good idea to tell your boyfriend that you've been thinking about your ex.
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If you’re in a relationship, but you still have lingering feelings for an ex, it might be best not to tell your boyfriend about these feelings. Think about your feelings and about your commitment to your current boyfriend, psychologist Marie Hartwell-Walker tells PsychCentral. Whether you choose to tell your boyfriend depends on how you plan to proceed in the relationship and on the nature of your feelings.

1 To Tell or Not to Tell

It's normal to think about an ex from time to time -- especially, if you broke up with him recently. Lingering romantic feelings for your old love might be a sign, however, that you're not ready for a new relationship. You might want to tell your boyfriend that you're struggling with some personal issues and you're not sure if you're ready to be in a committed relationship yet. You might want to tell him what those personal issues are, but talking about your ex might hurt your boyfriend. If you are having passing thoughts about times you spent with your ex, it's usually best to keep those feelings to yourself. If you and your current boyfriend openly talk about past relationships and you feel secure in your relationship, however, then sharing a story about your ex might be OK.

Anna Green has been published in the "Journal of Counselor Education and Supervision" and has been featured regularly in "Counseling News and Notes," Keys Weekly newspapers, "Travel Host Magazine" and "Travel South." After earning degrees in political science and English, she attended law school, then earned her master's of science in mental health counseling. She is the founder of a nonprofit mental health group and personal coaching service.