She's on the lookout, searching desperately for a new guy to hang with 24-7. Whether a woman is feverishly looking for her next beau or she is clutching onto her current boyfriend, clinging to him with all of her might, desperation isn't a quality that most men want in a romantic partner. If you suspect that you're acting -- or have acted -- desperate, knowing if a man can sense it or not is key to evaluating your approach.
When a woman's desperate dating behavior stems from low self-esteem, a guy can sense the clear lack of confidence. Even though everyone feels badly about themselves at some time, a constant flood of negative thoughts can show up on your face and in your actions. For example, if Jane is always thinking that she's got bad hair, a big nose and huge thighs, John, Jack, Joey and everyone else will sense her esteem issues. The good news is that it's possible to turn around low self-esteem and put the dating desperation in the past. By focusing on your positives, setting realistic expectations and taking pride in yourself, you can boost your confidence, according to the article "How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem" on the "Teens Health" website.
Following him like a little, lost puppy isn't likely to land you the guy. Clinging to a man, constantly calling him, sending mass amounts of texts or otherwise acting needy are all red flags that your guy can sense. For example, Tara desperately wants Will to ask her out on a second date. As the hours tick by she becomes increasingly more desperate for him to call. Her neediness gets the best of her and she calls him -- again and again. Her needy desperation is something that Will can sense every time her number pops up on his cell. Instead of acting like Tara, take a deep breath, relax or focus on something else such as a long jog or Pilates class.
Anyone Is Welcome
Just how badly do you want a date? If you're so desperate to get a guy that you'll take anyone who answers your plea, the desperation is sure to show. Before you settle for any guy out there, think about what you're really looking for and don't settle for anything less. This doesn't mean that you need to go from desperate to aloof or act like you're better than everyone else. Instead, don't let desperation drag you down or force you into making poor decisions. Settling on a man because you want a "boyfriend," and not necessarily him, is something that most guys can sense.
He Won't Change
He just isn't into you. If you're completely unwilling to accept this idea, and continue to pursue the guy, he'll quickly sense your overwhelming desperation. Whether he seemed to like you at first or it was wishful thinking on your part, it's unlikely that you can change his mind and force him to feel something that he doesn't. Tune into the signals that he's sending out. When he doesn't ask you out, makes no effort to contact you or declines your "friend request" on Facebook, trying to make him change his view of you will only add insult to injury. Turn your efforts away from him and focus on improving yourself or building a relationship with someone who truly does care.
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