He's checking your phone, he's on your social media page, and he's accusing you of crushing on someone else. What do you do when your boyfriend thinks that you like another guy? If you're not being dishonest, take it as a sign that he doesn't trust you or has jealousy issues. Saving the relationship means helping your boyfriend to build his self-confidence and understand that you're a truly trustworthy girl.
Explain Who You Are
Like a skyscraper, trust isn't built overnight. Just like a building goes up layer by layer over time, so does the trust in your relationship. If your relationship is new or you don't feel like your boyfriend really knows you well, suggest that he take some more time before he makes wild accusations. Explain that you're trustworthy -- provided that you actually are -- and tell him that in time he will see it. His accusations may come from not knowing you well enough to trust you or even from experiences he has had in the past with other girls who cheated. Giving it time will show him that he has no reason not to believe you.
Honesty Is the Best Policy
Trust and honesty go together hand in hand. Without one, you can't have the other or a healthy relationship, according to the article "What's Your Relationship Reality?" on Stayteen.org. Start an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend, letting him know the full story of what's really going on. If he's just making up something that isn't there, tell him so. On the other hand, if his accusations come from something he saw, be honest with him. For example, he accuses you of liking your lab partner because the two of you always text. If the reason for your constant texting is your upcoming assignment, explain it and offer to show him the messages.
While your boyfriend's jealousy may signal a lack of self-esteem on his part, it may also mean more. Accusing and controlling behaviors are signs of dating violence, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. If you feel that your boyfriend's accusations are threatening, mean, bullying or irrational, get out and get help immediately. The same goes for accusations that include stalking. For example, you catch your boyfriend following you at the mall or to a local club to check up on you. Talk to a trusted adult such as a parent, teacher or counselor about the situation.
Unless you're cheating, you need to get assertive and show your guy that there's no one other than him. Assertive speaking shows that you have confidence and the ability to stand up for yourself, according to the article "Assertiveness" on the "Teens Health" website. Respect your boyfriend's worries, but let him know that you've done nothing wrong. Make clear statements such as, "Will is my friend. He has been for years, and I've never had any romantic interest in him." If your boyfriend still doesn't believe you or refuses to listen, it's time to consider moving on.
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