How to Let Your Best Friend Know You're Angry

Remind yourself why you love your BFF before starting an argument.
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For the most part, your BFF is the center of your social life. But at times, he angers you. He may insult you, act jealously or snub you in favor of someone else. Letting your best friend know that you are angry is a must. Keep the lines of communication open and continue building your relationship.

1 Stay Calm

Anger is a powerful emotion that is often challenging to handle. Although your feelings may make you see red, communicating your anger in an openly aggressive way isn't likely to resolve any issues. Take a deep breath and count to 10 before you start your conversation. Calmly explain your anger to your friend. While you might feel like throwing a tantrum or yelling at the top of your lungs, take a more mature approach and stay calm to make your point.

2 Assertive Actions

Sheepishly mumbling that you are angry isn't likely to get the message across. Approach the situation with assertiveness. Speak your mind in a respectful and honest way, according to the article, "Assertiveness," on the TeensHealth website. Stand up for yourself and tell your friend how and why you believe he has wronged you. If he disagrees, calmly let him know that his actions have upset you and that he needs to listen to -- and respect -- you.

3 Open Up

Just because the two of you share everything doesn't mean that you have an emotional connection that moves from you to her without words. Instead of hoping she'll get the message, open up and tell her what is troubling you. Tell her why you are angry at her and what you hope to get out of the conversation. For example, "It really upset me when you told Jane that I like John. That was supposed to be a secret between the two of us. Please don't tell her my secrets anymore."

4 First Person

When you tell your friend that you are angry, you are also trying to resolve a conflict or get your relationship back on track. He needs to know what you are feeling. Lead with "I" statements that show how you feel, according to the article "5 Ways to (Respectfully) Disagree," on the TeensHealth website. For example, instead of saying, "You always lose my stuff when you borrow it. You never take care of my things," try, "I feel hurt because you lost my favorite football jersey. I feel like my things don't matter to you." If he apologizes and says it won't happen again, end the conversation there. If he shrugs off your request and makes no effort to apologize, reconsider your friendship.

Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since 2009. Her articles have appeared in "Pittsburgh Parent Magazine" and the website PBS Parents. She has a Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education.