How to Handle a Bully With a Letter to the Teacher

Communicating with a teacher through well-written letters can eliminate bullying.

If your child is being ridiculed, harassed, humiliated, or intimated by other students while at school, then he might be a victim of bullying. This occurs any time a student or group of students hurt another child intentionally with actions or words. If you suspect your child is experiencing this, keep a written log of the bullying incidents he reports to you. Write a letter to the teacher, then consult with her and the guidance counselor to discuss the matter. Follow up the meeting with a "thank you" letter, outlining the actions the teacher promised to take.

  • Pencil
  • Paper

1 Letter to the Teacher

2 Address the teacher

Address the teacher by full name at the beginning of the letter in the form of "Dear M(r)s.".

3 Explain that your child

Explain that your child has informed you that he has been bullied by a fellow classmate on several occasions. List two or three occasions briefly, if applicable.

4 State

State your concern in addition to how the bullying is affecting your son's ability to learn, make friends or participate in activities. Note any patterns in declining grades or disengagement that support your argument.

5 End the paragraph

End the paragraph by asking if you can set up a meeting at the teacher's earliest convenience.

6 Provide your contact information

Provide your contact information and your dates of availability.

7 Mail a copy

Mail a copy of the letter to your child's guidance counselor and his principal, who might both be willing to participate in the meeting and even address bullying policies.

8 Store

Store a copy of the letter in your child's bullying log in case you decide to take legal action in the future.

9 "Thank You" Letter to the Teacher

10 Address the teacher-2

Address the teacher by full name at the beginning of the letter in the form of "Dear M(r)s.".

11 Thank the teacher

Thank the teacher for her time regarding your bullying complaints.

12 List the actions

List the actions decided on during the meeting as a reminder to the teacher. Use bullet points, if necessary.

13 Say that you

Say that you look forward to meeting with your teacher once more to discuss your child's progress. Provide dates of availability if the meeting time was not previously arranged.

14 Thank you

Store a copy of the "thank you" letter in your child's bullying log.

  • If the teacher and principal fail to take action, address the school board with your complaints.
  • Before taking action, gather the following information in your child's bullying log: the names of the children involved, the time and place of each incident, what occurred and photographs of physical abuse, if applicable.
  • Signs of being bullied include depression, nightmares, an unwillingness to go to school and poor academic performance.

Nicole Newman is a Dartmouth College associate who works in Tiltfactor Laboratory, Dartmouth's premier game design center. Her research has included investigating the digital humanities through "Writing as a Dimensional Artifact" and "Evolution of the Ghetto: The Decline of America’s Inner Cities," a research initiative on urban design.