Good Relationships Vs. Bad Relationships

Hitting can be a sign of a bad relationship.
... Images

Some relationships leave you looking forward to the future and feeling confident about your partnership, while others leave you with a feeling of dread. Understanding what makes a good or bad relationship can help you choose romantic partners more wisely. It can also help you get out of romantic situations that are not in your best interest.

1 Healthy Relationships

In a healthy or good relationship, partners feel secure and trust one another, according to the TeensHealth article, "Am I In a Healthy Relationship?" Both partners should give and take in equal measure, be honest with one another and have interests and hobbies outside of the relationship. In a healthy partnership, couples understand how to handle disagreements without name calling or fighting. Respect is also an important aspect of a healthy relationship. If your partner respects your opinions and backs off when you do not want to do something, it is another sign of a healthy relationship.

2 Unhealthy Relationships

Some relationships leave you feeling worse about yourself. If your partner monitors where you go, who you talk to and how you spend money, it may be a sign of controlling behavior, according to psychologist Sherrie Bourg Carter in the Psychology Today article, "Toxic Relationships: A Health Hazard." Unhealthy behaviors can also include pressuring a partner for sex, hitting or issuing threats. If you mostly give while your partner takes, if your partner frequently criticizes you or tries to change you, or if you feel insecure, it may be best to leave.

3 Realistic Expectations

You may worry that your relationship is bad because of disagreements. Unrealistic expectations about what a partner can do also shape how you feel about your relationship. While expecting to see your partner a few times a week can be reasonable, expecting to spend all of your free time together can leave both of you feeling smothered, according to the PsychCentral article, "7 Tips on Developing and Maintaining a Successful Intimate Relationship." Adjusting your expectations -- and communicating those expectations to your partner -- can help the two of you make the most out of your wants and needs.

4 Moving Forward

If your relationship leaves you feeling consistently unhappy, it may be time to move on. It is ideal to meet in person for the breakup. Call if your relationship is long distance, according to the TeensHealth article, "How to Break Up Respectfully." Avoid calling names or blaming your partner for the breakup. You might begin the conversation by saying, "I have come to a difficult decision. I felt distrustful after learning that you flirted with someone else at a party. I cannot regain that trust, so I feel it is best if we go our separate ways." While you can be honest about why you are ending the relationship, stay kind and respectful when you do so.

Candice Coleman worked in the public school system as a middle school and high school substitute teacher. In addition to teaching, she is also a tutor for high school and college students.