How to Date a Girl That Wants to Go Slow

Let your girl know that you care about her.
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If that initial spark of electrical attraction that you feel for your crush-turned-girlfriend makes you want to put your relationship on the fast track, but your girlfriend says she wants to take things slow, put patience above the urge to push. Respect her opinion and take things down a notch.

1 Respect Her

Your girlfriend has boundaries, and you need to respect them. Respecting your significant other's beliefs, values and opinions is part of having a healthy relationship, according to the website. Make it a point to see her view and understand why she's making this decision. Respect for her needs shows that you care enough about her to take things at a pace that she can handle. For example, perhaps she's grown up with religious beliefs that say she shouldn't get into a mature relationship until she's ready for marriage. Or, perhaps she had a past relationship that ended badly, so she's less comfortable speeding things along in this new relationship. Showing respect for her boundaries can help her to feel more comfortable in the relationship and build a greater sense of trust between the two of you, deepening your connection.

2 Careful Communication

Chances are, your girlfriend's preference for taking things slow is not just a random decision that she made with the intent of frustrating you. Create an open line of communication, in which you both discuss what you're comfortable with. If she's shy to open up, ask her to be completely honest with you about how fast or slow she wants to take your relationship. This also means that you should do the same. That said, avoid asking aggressively or making it seem like you think her ideas are silly. For example, try something like, "I care about you and want us to be able to talk about everything. I want you to feel comfortable as we define our boundaries and build the trust between us."

3 Practice Patience

Pushing your girl to speed things up when she wants to go slow might prematurely end your relationship. Instead of giving in to your fast-track mind, rushing to a level that she isn't ready for, practice patience. Practicing patience provides you both with the time to truly get to know each other and to build an emotional connection. You can spend time together talking and exploring each other's personality, learning about each other in a way that goes deeper than something that is purely physical.

4 Live in the Moment

Savor the simple things -- spending the day at the park together, holding hands under a starry sky or a simple dinner out with friends. If your girl wants to take things slow, stop thinking about what you aren't doing and focus on the now. Think about how you feel when you're with her. Take your relationship day by day, staying in the present and not worrying about what will happen a week, a month or even a year from now.

Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since 2009. Her articles have appeared in "Pittsburgh Parent Magazine" and the website PBS Parents. She has a Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education.