10 Warning Signs a Relationship Is Going to Fail

Constant arguing is one sign that a relationship is in a bad place.
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After the blush of a new relationship has faded, warning signs that the relationship won’t last are easier to see and harder to ignore. Whether it’s a sign you only see when you two are alone or a glaringly obvious warning that’s noticed by everyone around you, warning signs shouldn’t be ignored. If any of these signs sound familiar, make some changes in your relationship, or it might not last.

1 Jealousy and Insecurity

Jealousy is often the consequence of other issues, such as insecurity and mistrust. Your girlfriend or boyfriend can exhibit jealousy by constantly asking to check your cellphone, demanding that you not spend time with anyone of the opposite sex or similar actions. Hara Estroff Marano, author of the Psychology Today article “Jealousy: Love’s Destroyer,” notes that people in relationships oftentimes use jealousy as a way to control their partners. Constantly reaffirming to your guy or girl how much you care or assuring them that they have no reason to be jealous can become frustrating in a long-term relationship. If you’re constantly seeing these warning signs, it’s important to communicate with your partner. Keep in mind that jealousy may not have anything to do with your actions, and someone else’s insecurity isn’t something you can easily fix.

2 Anger and Abuse

Always being in a bad mood and expressing it by yelling can be a major red flag. Whether he constantly yells at others or frequently screams at you, this person is exhibiting difficulty with expressing emotions. Your boyfriend or girlfriend is likely to blame you for any issues in the relationship, according to Dr. Steven Stosny, author of the article “Living with an Angry Partner.” Avoid blaming yourself for your partner’s actions and instead communicate to her how her anger makes you feel and what will need to change if you’re going to stay together. You should also heed the warning signs if your relationship has intensified to physical abuse. It can be easier to ignore these signs and feign happiness, but unless your partner makes significant changes, your relationship could have a disastrous ending.

3 Infidelity, Exes and Disrespect

Infidelity can take the shape of a physical relationship or emotional involvement. If your girl or guy has cheated, you may find it difficult to trust. Without trust, relationships are constantly plagued by accusations and worry that the person will cheat again. Emotional infidelity may not seem like a major issue, but it means that your partner is investing time and energy in someone else instead of strengthening your relationship. Another warning sign is your boyfriend or girlfriend’s relationship with an ex. If your conversations always find their way back to their ex or that person is still a major part of daily life, your partner may not have moved on, according to the eHarmony article “Seven Signs You’re a Rebound.” When these warning signs show themselves and you talk to your partner, it’s also necessary to note how he reacts. Someone who disregards your feelings by continuing to cheat or carry on with his ex is showing you that on some level, he doesn't respect you.

4 Distance, Extreme Opposites and Selfishness

Distance, both physical and emotional, can be troublesome in maintaining a strong relationship. Although “absence makes the heart grow fonder,” you may find that physical distance without any end in sight makes it hard to stay happy together. On the flip side, constant togetherness with no actual emotional connection can be a warning as well. This distance will grow or tarnish an otherwise happy relationship if it goes unaddressed. If you find that you and your partner are opposites on major issues, such as marriage or beliefs, it can be a warning that the relationship will fail. Another red flag is dealing with a selfish partner. For example, you may find that you’re constantly giving more than you get back or adjusting your time to suit his schedule.

Based in Chicago, Nicole Nalls has been writing and editing career and education-related articles since 2008. Her articles have appeared in "Venus Zine" magazine, as well as a number of online publications. She holds a Bachelor of Science in sociology from Illinois State University.

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