How to Get a Broken Friendship Back on Course
As friends, you have countless shared memories filled with laughter and good times. He's been your confidant, your rock during difficult times, and you never doubted that he'd be in your life through thick and thin. However, you and your friend are going through a rough patch and now the future of your friendship is questionable. Fortunately, you can get your broken friendship back on course by taking the appropriate steps to resolve your issues.
1 Consider if the Relationship Is Worth Mending
Prior to putting in the time and effort to fix your friendship, take time to consider if this is what you truly want. Consider why your friendship is broken and if there are feasible steps you can take to mend it. The current strife between you and your friend may be an indication that your friendship has run its course, suggests psychologist Irene S. Levine on "Psychology Today" online. Consider if you or your friend has changed, making the two of you incompatible. For example, if your friend has developed a zest for material items and believes her happiness comes from a designer purse and you couldn't care less, you may have inadvertently taken different paths. It can be painfully hard to end a friendship, but a shared history alone isn't reason enough to continue a friendship.
2 Make the First Move
If you decide that your friendship is worth saving, it is important that you reach out to your friend. Don't sit back and wait for your friend to take the initiative to contact you. If you stubbornly wait for his call, the call may never come, which likely will be the end of your friendship. It can be hard to pick up the phone and make the first move, especially if you feel you've been wronged, but it is a necessary step if you want to get your broken friendship back on course. Set your pride aside, pick up the phone and tell your friend that your friendship is important to you.
3 Open and Honest Communication
A key part of repairing a broken friendship is an awareness that the main issue in all relationship breakdowns is a lack of communication, writes Rebecca Bent, CEO of the Handel Group, on her "Huffington Post" blog. For example, maybe you got in a fight with your friend because you accused her of flirting with your boyfriend. It's important that you listen to her side of the story; allow your friend to speak and ensure she feels like she is heard, says Bent. Listen without interrupting and try to see the situation from her eyes.
4 Assume Responsibility for Your Part
Consider your part in what happened to cause your friendship to fall apart. Ignoring the issue that caused the breakdown can make it worse in the long run, as hurt, resentful feelings will continue to eat away at your friendship. Acknowledge what happened, the role you played in the breakdown of your friendship and apologize. For instance, admit that you were acting selfish or that you overreacted, and say that you're sorry for your behavior. Acknowledging your part in the breakdown of your friendship will help your friend to consider his part and responsibility in the breakdown.