In the days after a funeral, write notes of thanks on notepaper or blank cards to those who served as pallbearers. Although you might be busy with post-funeral affairs, your notes of thanks to the pallbearers shouldn't take long to write. An effective note of thanks, especially after a funeral, can be just a few short sentences acknowledging your appreciation for the person's support.
Briefly Express Thanks
Write "Dear" and the pallbearer's name, and then express your thanks or thanks on behalf of your family, depending on the situation. Your expression of gratitude doesn't need to be more than a sentence. Add a sentence that builds on your thanks, close the note with a sentiment such as "Sincerely," and sign your name. A sample note of thanks to a pallbearer can be as simple as the following:
Please accept warmest thanks from the entire Smith family for the support you provided as a pallbearer at David's funeral. Having you there for us is something we won't every forget.
Sincerely, Robert and family*
After a funeral, it's proper etiquette to respond in writing to not only the pallbearers, but also to those who send sympathy notes and flowers and those who deliver eulogies. If your grief is such that you aren't able to get through writing a number of notes, it's acceptable to have a family member or even a close friend look after this task on your behalf. The content of the notes of thanks should follow the same format, but explain that the person is writing on behalf of the family in mourning.
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