Wedding Invitation Etiquette for Presiding Minister & Family

If you omit the minister's children from the invitation the implication is that they are not invited.
... Creatas Images/Creatas/Getty Images

When you're planning your wedding day, the guest list is one of the biggest tasks. While people who are participating in the ceremony are obviously assumed to be in attendance, you should still send them invitations. For example, it is proper etiquette to send a formal invitation to the presiding minister. If you know him personally, you may also invite his family.

1 Outer Envelope

When you are addressing an invitation to a minister, the common title used is "The Reverend." When including the minister's wife, you would address the minister first. For example, on the outside of the wedding invitation, you would address them in the format "The Reverend Jacob and Mrs. Samantha Smith."

2 Inner Envelope

On the inside of the envelope, you should be more specific about exactly who is invited. While the outer envelope is addressed to the adults in the household, you should list the minister's children on the inner envelope when they are welcome to attend. Children are always listed under parents, and the first names of the parents can be omitted. For example:

The Reverend and Mrs. Smith Sara Smith David Smith

3 When to Send

You should send the presiding minister an invitation at the same time you send your other invitations, which is traditionally between six and eight weeks before the wedding date. Even though the minister should already have your special day on his calendar, this formal notice serves as a friendly reminder.

4 Considerations

If your minister uses a salutation other than The Reverend, always defer to the title that he prefers. Likewise, if you are aware that his wife uses a title other than Mrs., such as Ms., always default to what she prefers. If you are sending an invitation to a minister who is married to another member of the clergy, you may address the envelope to "The Reverends Jacob and Samantha Smith."

Lara Webster has been writing professionally since 2009. Her work has been featured on Relationships in the Raw, The Nursery Book, Spark Trust and several travel-related websites. Webster holds a Bachelor of Arts in English and a Master of Arts in mass communication and media studies, both from San Diego State University.

×