How to Not Run Out of Topics When Talking to Your Girlfriend
If you have been dating your girlfriend for a while, you might find there is nothing left to say. Although silence can sometimes be a nice break, having topics ready for conversation will ensure that the two of you don't get bored. You don't have to be a small talk genius to come up with original ideas to talk about -- you just need to be prepared.
1 Keep Current
Stay on top of current events and you will always have something new to discuss, says author Gretchen Rubin on "Psychology Today" online. News, sports, movies, books and celebrity gossip are all fair game. Don't just mention the latest celebrity scandal -- ask your girlfriend what she thinks. For example, say "What did you think about the Tom Cruise defamation lawsuit?" or "How did you like Justin Timberlake's latest video?" Asking her opinion will help bridge the connection to new ideas for discussion.
2 Ask Open-Ended Questions
Surely you don't know everything about your girlfriend. You might know where she grew up, but would she ever consider moving back? Ask open-ended questions, advises Rubin, to draw out conversation and get the other person talking. Open-ended questions can't be answered with "yes" or "no," and usually begin with the words "How" or "What." Women are more likely to drop hints than be direct about topics that interest them, so you may need to play detective, suggests psychologist Amy Johnson on Your Tango. If she seems to want to talk about the future, say something like, "What do you see yourself doing five years from now?"
3 Ask Prying Questions
Sometimes prying questions can spark interesting conversation, notes Rubin. Ask your girlfriend something that is slightly cheeky and see what kind of reaction you receive. For example, you might say "What did you think of me when you first saw me?" "Do you keep secrets?" or "What is the wildest thing you have ever done?" Hopefully your girlfriend responds in a good way, and the conversation takes an interesting turn. Prying questions can be used when it feels like things are getting stale -- and you want to add some spice.
4 Plan Three Topics
Plan at least three topics of conversation in advance of every social encounter, recommends motivational speaker Debra Fine on her website. If you know you will be going on a date or meeting up with your girlfriend, have three ideas of things to talk about ready before you head out the door. For example, you might plan to talk about the latest political scandal, a movie that you are hoping to see and her favorite types of food. Approach these topics with open-ended questions, and you won't likely run out of things to say.