You make the reservations, pick out a cool -- but casual -- outfit and get ready for your date, when the girl suddenly cancels. Unless she's already your long-term love, the cancellation may leave you wondering if she's interested in you after all. Before you give up on your budding relationship, assess the situation by taking a look at what's really going on.
More Than an Occasion
Canceling one date is a different ball game then consistently canceling plans. Continuously canceling dates should signal you to move on, according to psychologist Jill Weber, writing for "Psychology Today." When judging whether or not the girl is truly interested in you, count how many times she has cancelled. If it's more than a handful of times in a row, she's probably just not that into you.
Something Came Up
Both you and your girl live in an uncertain world. A recently announced test, a sick family member, babysitting duties or a new work assignment may all mean that the girl has to break her plans without much notice. A one-time cancel with an explanation that something came up doesn't necessarily indicate that she doesn't want anything to do with you, especially if she suggests an alternative day that works better for her. If the girl politely lets you know that she has to cancel and provides a reasonable explanation -- such as her boss is demanding that she stay late -- go ahead and ask her out for a second try. On the other hand, if she "forgot about her cousin's friend's neighbor's dog's birthday party," don't bother.
Some teens and young adults may use dating as a means to gain popularity, according to the article "Love and Romance" on the TeensHealth website. While not every girl is a social climber or relies on her friends' opinions more than her own, quickly canceling a date may mean that someone else told her to. For example, you aren't in the same social circle as the girl and you hear that her friends are telling her that you're just no good for her. The next day she cancels your date out of the blue. It's likely that she's still interested, but the pressure from her peers won out. In this type of case you can still pursue another date, allowing her to change her decision and make up her own mind.
If your potential date is inexperienced when it comes to love and romance, her sudden cancellation may have more to do with cold feet than her interest in you. Teens and young adults are in the beginning stages of learning how to date. If this is the first date that the girl's had, or if she gets too nervous, she may back out from the stress. In this situation, you'll only know that she's feeling anxious if she -- or one of her friends -- tells you. If she does 'fess up, ask her out again. When a girl doesn't admit to having cold feet, give her time to see if she'll change her mind later on.
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