It is easy for a relationship to veer off course. After all, you juggle the expectations of your parents, teachers and friends in addition to maintaining the equilibrium between the two of you. But even if stress derails your relationship, you can take steps to get it back on track. Recognize problems and commit to change.
Start With "I'm Sorry"
Accept responsibility for your role in the problems and apologize to your girlfriend or boyfriend. A sincere apology is one of easiest ways to address the hurtful consequences of words or deeds you wish you could take back, says psychologist John Grohol in the Psych Central article, “How to Make an Adept, Sincere Apology.” Your apology doesn’t need to be complicated, but it should sound sincere to be accepted. For example, if you concede that your behavior was wrong, take responsibility for your choices and ask your partner how to make amends, your apology may be accepted.
In order to regain your perspective, spend time doing things you want to do. In so doing, you will bring the passion of your interests into the relationship, according to marriage and family therapist Sherrie Campbell, quoted in the WebMD article, "How to Rekindle the Spark in Your Relationship." Your self reliance and goals are attractive. Spend time with your friends, engage in your favorite hobbies and get plenty of rest.
Two Ears, One Mouth
Good communication keeps your relationship alive and well, according to marriage and family therapist Lisa Kift in the Family and Marriage Counseling Directory article, “Ten Characteristics of Successful Relationships.” Take the time to connect and talk about big and little issues that color your day at school and at home. Listen without judgment and demonstrate respect for your partner’s concerns, problems and successes. Discuss problems in your relationship in a manner that shows respect for your partner’s feelings. Avoid complaints that may be interpreted as a personal attack.
The Magic Words
Take the time to say thank you. Express your appreciation for the gestures that brighten your day, recommends psychologist Darby Saxbe in the Psychology Today article, “10 Ways to Perk Up Your Relationship.” It is normal to feel more comfortable in a relationship as you develop habits and routines for interacting with one another, but don’t permit ingratitude to become one of those habits. When your boyfriend ensures that your favorite snacks are on hand, remember to thank him.
- Psych Central: How to Make an Adept, Sincere Apology
- Family and Marriage Counseling Directory: Ten Characteristics of Successful Relationships
- Psych Central: 5 Secrets to a Successful Long-Term Relationship or Marriage
- Psychology Today: 10 Ways to Perk Up Your Relationship
- WebMD: How to Rekindle the Spark in Your Relationship
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