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Ways to End a Relationship Without Hard Feelings

by Candice Coleman, Demand Media

    That loving feeling has gone -- but your relationship with your partner is still going. Though ending a relationship can be difficult, it can give both people the freedom to pursue a more fulfilling partnership in the future. Though there are no guarantees that your partner will accept the breakup with grace, there are ways to increase the odds of the relationship ending without hard feelings.

    Planning Ahead

    Maybe the two of you had a disagreement and the anger is still under the surface. In other cases, the trust feels permanently broken and arguments go unresolved. Plan ahead before you go into the breakup conversation. If the current issue could be handled with effort and time, consider talking to your partner about how to resolve it instead. If you find yourself wanting to pursue a relationship with someone new or staying in the relationship only to spare your partner's feelings, it may be time to move on, according to the University of Georgia Health Center's article "Ending a Relationship." Rehearse how you plan to tell your partner ahead of time.

    Breaking It Off

    Ending things in person or by phone in a long-distance relationship is ideal, according to the Emily Post Institute article "Breaking Up." Though this process can be painful, it is best to get to business immediately. You might open the conversation by saying, "I've thought a long time about this decision. We frequently fight and never find a resolution. I feel it is better if we are no longer together," according to the clinical psychologist Susan Heitler, in the Psychology Today article "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do, So Here's a 6-Step How-to." This can be painful for your partner to hear -- so there is no need to assign blame or issue insults along the way.

    Considerations in Breaking Up

    While you may want to avoid seeing your partner in pain, you should not breakup by text message or email. Your partner may find this hurtful and disrespectful, according to the KidsHealth article "How to Break Up Respectfully." Take care when discussing your intentions with others before the breakup, too, as these people may also tell your partner.

    Going on With Life

    The relationship is over, but the impact of it may not be. Choose your words carefully when talking to friends or family members -- you never know if they may run into your ex in the future and pass on what you have said, according to KidsHealth. If you catch wind of hurtful words from your former partner, continue holding your head high and carry on with life. There is no need to bother yourself with a relationship that is over.

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    About the Author

    Candice Coleman worked in the public school system as a middle school and high school substitute teacher. In addition to teaching, she is also a tutor for high school and college students.

    Photo Credits

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