Things to Ask a Friend That You Haven't Seen in a Long Time

You are elated to run into a former friend as you have plenty of fond memories you shared with him. You will likely want to ask him plenty of things about his life now and have him fill you in on what you missed out on. If you are stumped about what to ask him, several conversation starters can help you reconnect with your old friend and possibly help start back up the friendship you once had with him.

The last time you and your friend talked, she may have mentioned to you something she desired to accomplish in her life. Ask her about it. Asking questions effectively starts a conversation, as most people enjoy talking about themselves, according to the Help Guide article "How to Make Friends." Perhaps you remember her telling you how she was in the process of starting a book club. Find out how the club is doing now. You may remember she told you she wanted to take beginner guitar lessons. Ask her if she is now an advanced guitarist. You may also find that your friend is into other things now and has completely different goals.

Ask your friend if he remembers significant moments you shared together. Reflect on your past interactions and how you two made good friends. Perhaps you can ask him if he remembers something funny you did together. You might have dressed as aliens for a costume party or played pranks on each other. Maybe you can ask him if he remembers a past goal you completed together, such as building a tree house when you were kids or running in a marathon one summer. Talking about the good times you had with him might spark a desire to create more good memories together in the future.

School is a central part of every teenager or college student's life and is something you can relate to with your old friend. Ask her how she likes the school she is currently attending. Find out if she is in involved in any extracurricular activities. Also ask your friend about her educational pursuits. If your friend is in high school, ask her about what colleges interests her or if she has other post-graduation plans, such as joining the military. If your friend is college-aged, ask her about her plans after graduation. Find out if she plans to further her studies in grad school or wants to go straight into the workforce.

You probably do not want to lose contact with your friend since you have reconnected. Social media can be helpful in staying connected if you don't have time to send emails, according to the Psychology Today website article "Eight Tips for Maintaining Friendships" by Gretchen Rubin, the author of "The Happiness Project." Ask if he has a profile on any social media sites. Keep each other updated by uploading photos and instant messaging. Additionally, ask him for his cellphone number. Perhaps you can give him a ring to join you for lunch one day and make plans to do the things you used to enjoy doing together.