While sometimes in the dating world you will find guys you think are intimidating, there's also the possibility that you yourself are scaring off potential dates. This is especially true if your quietness or confidence is mistaken for snobbishness. Several strategies can help you seem more approachable, so the guys who catch your eye won't hesitate to make friendly and flirty conversation.
Caution With Nonverbal Cues
Even when you're not talking your body continues to send messages to those around you, warns lifestyle coach Renee Cutaia Olson in a "Huffington Post" article. When you perform actions such as crossing your arms, furrowing your brow or continually checking your phone, you appear disinterested and unapproachable. Instead, remember to make eye contact and smile at the guys you are interested in. This will signal that you aren't playing the role of an ice queen.
Reassess Your Crowd
Take a look at your group of friends. If you're at a dance club, surrounded by a large crowd of your female friends, it's unlikely that a man will approach you, says Cutaia Olson. Limit the amount of friends you take with you on outings, especially if you're hoping to attract a male interest. Once you've a caught a guy's attention with your eye contact and grin, move away from your group slightly so he won't feel intimidated over the possibility of making a fool of himself in front of your group.
Attract Them With Honey
Make the guys you meet feel important, suggests dating coach Paige Parker on the Your Tango website. An easy way to do this is to ask him for a favor or his opinion on a subject. For example, ask him if he can help you find a specific building on campus or if he will share his umbrella with you during a storm. Remember to toss in a sincere compliment here and there as well. Tell him how considerate he is, or that he seems to be in shape.
Don't try too hard to cover all of your imperfections. Men will find you less intimidating if you loosen up and show a bit of vulnerability, suggests Paige. So don't be afraid to admit you don't know something or look a little clumsy. Make a joke and laugh off the incident. For example, if you happen to trip or lose your balance, say, "I see those unicycle riding classes are paying off for me." The goal is to show that you're only human. In turn, he'll relate to you and realize it's safe to relax in your company.
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