Dating a guy with a promiscuous past means moving forward and getting over his player days. If your beau was wild before he met you, coming to grips with his lengthy list of ex loves is a must when it comes to feeling comfortable in your relationship. Whether you have jealousy issues, are hearing rumors or have concerns about his sexual health, overcoming your feelings about his past ways is a challenge that you can meet.
It Doesn't Define Him
Your guy's past is just one aspect of who he is -- or who he was. If you're trying to get over his promiscuous past, remind yourself that his past romances don't define him. Think about all of the reasons that you fell for your boyfriend. Chances are that his long list of loves isn't one of them. Look at his positives and focus on them, instead of on his checkered past.
Roughly 9.5 million new cases of sexually transmitted diseases -- or STDs -- in 13 to 24-year-olds are reported each year, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Part of getting over your guy's promiscuous past means confronting him about his former partners. While you don't need to ask for a list of names and numbers, you do need to make sure that he knows what his STD status is. Ask your guy to see a doctor -- if he hasn't already -- or visit a clinic to get tested.
Instead of turning your mood downward, focus on the positive times that you're having with your guy. The more that you focus on your positive emotions, the more you'll have of them. While you can't just slap a smile on your face and fool yourself into being happy about your guy's past, don't allow his former promiscuity to put you in a nasty mood. Think about the happy parts of your relationship -- such as the romantic dinner that your guy cooked for you -- instead of focusing on his former flames.
The Past Isn't the Present
While your guy's promiscuity says something about who he was, if he's truly done with that stage of his life it doesn't have to impact your relationship. Leave his former player ways where they belong -- in the past. If you feel jealous about the girls who he's been with, take a look inward and evaluate your own sense of self-esteem. Unless your guy is going back to his former ways, feel confident that the past is in the past.
- Psychology Today: Too Many Lovers, Too Little Love; Marina Adshade, Ph.D.
- U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Sexual Risk Behavior: HIV, STD, and Teen Pregnancy Prevention
- TeensHealth: 3 Ways to Increase Positive Emotions
- PsychCentral: Can't Stop Thinking About Boyfriend's Sexual Past; Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW
- Jupiterimages/Stockbyte/Getty Images