How to Tell if You're Too Proud

Ask your friends if you are too proud to get a fresh perspective.
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If you have a suspicion that you are too proud, you may be uncomfortable with the realization that pride is an issue for you. You might not want to accept the fact that you need to work on your attitude. The first step in overcoming your pride is to pinpoint it as a problem and be humble enough to change. By learning the signs of pride, you will be able to tell if you are too proud for your own good.

1 Examine Confidence

While you may think excessive pride is a sign of confidence, the truth is that it is often a symptom of insecurity. Insecurity may lead to personal aggrandizement, writes Dr. Joseph Cramer, a pediatrician, in the Deseret News article, "Competitive Desire for Power Rooted in Insecurity." If you feel insecure about your job, for example, you may try to get attention to feel better about yourself or appear more confident. Examine your sense of self-worth. Ask yourself if you are insecure or oversensitive.

2 Ask Friends

One simple way to find out if you are too proud is to ask your friends. If you are, they have noticed but are either too disinterested or afraid to let you know. Request total honesty. Explain that you think you might have been too proud lately, and need a fresh perspective on your behavior. If they say you are always bringing attention to yourself or bragging about your accomplishments, listen carefully and take their advice to heart. Focus on fixing the issues.

3 Survey Priorities

Take a close look at what you value most. If your physical appearance, social status or overall reputation is more important than relationships with others, you may be too proud. For example, if you attended a prestigious school and constantly bring this up in conversation, you risk appearing self-absorbed, according to Anita E. Kelly, professor of psychology at the University of Notre Dame. Also consider whether you find it difficult to admit your faults and place a high value on being right. Be honest as you analyze your priorities. Do not be too proud to recognize your shortcomings. Avoid putting a heavy value on enhancing your reputation.

4 Analyze Relationships

Take a close look at your most important relationships, especially while you are spending time with those people. In conversation, do you always direct the main focus to yourself? Do you ask questions as often as you answer them? Is your main goal to bring attention to yourself and brag about your accomplishments? By constantly putting the attention on you and your accomplishments, you are robbing yourself of the opportunity to get to know others and contribute to their well-being. If you find it difficult to change your behavior, you may benefit from seeing a counselor.

Kristen Moutria has a Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Evangel University. She is currently pursuing her Master of Arts in education from the University of Nebraska.

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