Given how nervous you probably feel about asking that special girl to that big event -- homecoming -- it’s natural to look for a way to ease your anxiety, such as contacting her via Facebook. While there are no umbrella guidelines for dating and social media, you can determine whether this is an appropriate venue by sizing up her own personality traits, considering how well the two of you know each other and minding your online manners. Deciding for sure on the “how” can help you feel more confident when it comes time to ask her.
Her Media Mode
How you ask her should depend in part on how she prefers to interact with others on a daily basis. Facebook and other social media sites can make a perfectly healthy socializing ground for teenagers, especially those who may feel lonely or isolated among peers, says John Grohol, CEO of Psych Central, in “Facebook Helps Ease Loneliness in Teens.” If she is somewhat withdrawn or seems to feel awkward when talking about important issues in person, she may welcome an invite via a social website.
The Same Old Etiquette
Even with modern media, the etiquette of yesterday is relevant when it comes to properly asking someone out. The elements of a successful request include being properly set up, according to the Emily Post Institute in “The All-Important ‘Ask.’” If you’re not already “friends” on Facebook, mentally prepare her and make sure she’s receptive to further contact by asking “Can I talk with you on Facebook sometime?” You have one built-in element of a good proposal in that you are asking her to a specific event, not just asking her to hang out. If possible, make sure to acknowledge her interests to show her your thoughtful side. “I heard that you’re excited about homecoming, and I’d love to go with you if you don’t already have a date” should suffice.
Phones Calls and Facebook
There are some Facebook-specific considerations you’ll need to keep in mind if you want to go with this venue. First, this way of asking her is generally considered acceptable when you don’t have her phone number, say Andrea Bartz, "Psychology Today" news editor, and Brenna Ehrlich, Mashable news editor, in a CNN article, “The Do’s and Don’ts of Asking Someone Out Online.” If she answers you in the affirmative, that’s the time to get her phone number so you two can work out the specifics in real time. If she needs time to think it over, give her the time, and refrain from messaging her repeatedly in hopes of getting a reply sooner.
Keeping It Crafty
Don’t neglect your creative side. Big school events, such as homecoming and prom, represent times when many students enjoy large, fun-loving gestures. Particularly if you know she’s the sort of person who appreciates an innovative approach, don’t let the fact that you’re asking online stunt your creativity. If you know she’s a “foodie,” consider spelling out your request in baguettes. If she’s a kid at heart, create a message out of balloons or even write it in crayon. Having crafted your masterpiece invite, take a photo and then attach it to your message.
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