It can be disheartening when a guy shows all the signs of liking you but pulls away. His hesitation may be due to a number of different reasons which may not be directly related to you. It is possible that your guy's actions are the result of a combination of factors. Fear of being betrayed, disappointed and rejected stop many people from moving forward with a relationship.
Afraid of Being Smothered
Your guy may be affected by what he has come to believe about girls and relationships. Based on how he was brought up, he may think that girls will get too clingy and needy as they become more involved, writes Charles Downey in the article, “Overcoming Fear of Intimacy,” on the BeliefNet website. The more you show him that you like him, the more he may question whether he is able to handle the attention. He may be unsure of how to move forward.
It is possible that he likes someone else. Perhaps he is pulling back to give himself time to figure out who he wants. He also may wish to date different girls, according to the article, "A Little Thing Called Fear of Commitment" on the TwoOfUs website. Another option is that your guy saw something in you that scared him away. Admitting that you have personal flaws is not easy. Personal traits such as bossiness, an uncontrollable temper, excessive competitiveness and the tendency to insult or embarrass others in public may give him second thoughts about being with you.
His parents may be going through a separation or divorce, or perhaps a family member has been diagnosed with a serious illness. Although he cares for you, these challenges are a major distraction. It is also possible that his family is experiencing financial difficulty. Sometimes families must relocate as a result of changes in the economy, job reassignments or the death of a loved one. Your guy may be unsure whether the relationship will survive going long-distance.
Ask Direct Questions
If your guy is pulling away, it may mean that you should confront him and ask what is happening. If you are unsure when you will see him next, call to arrange a good time to meet in person. Try to be calm and nonjudgmental.Tell him how you feel about him and share how his pulling away affects you. Listen carefully as he explains what may be bothering him. Once you find out what the issue is, you can discuss whether you want to work on the relationship or remain friends.
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