How to Forget About Your Boyfriend & Focus on You

A solo coffee date rejuvenates you in mind, body and soul.
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Loving your boyfriend doesn't mean you can't focus on yourself, so take some time to do things you enjoy and forget him for a while. Your independence will equal benefits for you and your boyfriend. Go on a date with yourself or jump into your hobbies in your alone time. Then, when you get back to your relationship, enjoy the treasures you discovered just by spending a moment alone.

1 Independently Important

Forgetting your boyfriend for a moment while you focus on yourself is an essential part of your relationship. When you don't focus on you, you end end up with more stress, which may affect your physical health. Sherrie Bourg Carter, Psy.D., says in the "Psychology Today" article "6 Reasons You Should Spend More Time Alone" that there are many benefits to your alone time, including self-discovery, clear thinking and better concentration. When you return to your boyfriend's company, you return with a newfound appreciation for him.

2 Solo Date Night

Having a date with yourself may seem crazy, but according to Araina Bond in the "Oprah" article "Is Independence the Key to Happiness?" it can be a good way for you to focus on yourself. Make your "date" time a sacred time to discover new and old parts of yourself. You can see a movie or go out to eat if these activities are in your comfort zone. Whatever you do, treat yourself the way you would treat your boyfriend: with tender, loving care and attention.

3 What About Your Friends

Hanging with friends is an entertaining way to get in touch with yourself. Socializing with others is healthy, especially when you're in a relationship. You give yourself a chance to be a different "you" around your friends than around your boyfriend. Your friends help you get in touch with the you they know, which helps to keep your life dynamic. You also end up enhancing your support system, which means you do not become reliant on love from a single source.

4 Do What You Love

Never forget the power of hobbies in your relationship. Whether you love crafts, exercising or reading, your hobbies are your way to get back in touch with yourself. To focus on you, take some time apart from your boyfriend to dive into your hobbies. The things you love to do have the capacity to make you feel alive and remind you that you can be happy by yourself as well as with your boyfriend. While it is okay to have shared hobbies, keep some activities to do by yourself.

S. Grey has a Master of Science in counseling psychology from the University of Central Arkansas. He is also pursuing a PhD and has a love for psychology, comic books and social justice. He has been published in a text on social psychology and regularly presents research at regional psychology conferences.

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