How to Deal with Rejection from a Boyfriend

Focus on your own well-being if your boyfriend rejects you.
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Rejection from a boyfriend is painful. But most young people experience rejection from someone they are in a relationship with at least once. Rejection brings with it a host of emotions -- anger, fear, resentment, humiliation -- all of which can lead to a bruised self-image. It is important to remember that being rejected does not mean you are not valued or important, notes the TeensHealth website. It just means that at this moment in time with this particular person, things did not work out. Understanding that your personal worth is not tied to the relationship can help you get through this difficult time.

1 Leave Gracefully

Leaving gracefully when your boyfriend rejects you empowers you to take some positive steps in your life. This means no begging to be taken back, no angry rants about how wrong he is and no falling into a heap at his feet. Rejection hurts. There is no way around it. By saving the emotional breakdown for your close friends and family members, you will be able to stand tall when you next see your ex.

2 Choose Your Response

Rejection makes you feel powerless. Choosing how you react to rejection gives you power. Choosing not to internalize the negative message you have received from your boyfriend preserves your self-esteem, suggests licensed clinical social worker Claire Arene in the article “The Most Important Step to Overcoming Rejection” for 4Therapy.com. Your response to the rejection and the power it has over you is your choice; you can choose not to let it affect who you are.

3 Learn All You Can

Even though you may not feel like it right now, it is possible to learn something about relationships when your boyfriend rejects you. Each relationship teaches you something about yourself, other people and what you want in a future partner, suggests the TeenHealth website.

4 Feel Your Feelings

While trying to focus on the positives after being rejected by your boyfriend, do not forget to feel and express your emotions. Rejection hurts. Give yourself permission to feel what you are feeling rather than telling yourself “I should not feel this way.” This gives you the chance to express yourself in emotionally healthy ways rather than blaming yourself for something that was out of your control.

Patti Richards has been a writer since 1990. She writes children’s books and articles on parenting, women's health and education. Her credits include San Diego Family Magazine, Metro Parent Magazine, Boys' Quest Magazine and many others. Richards has a Bachelor of Science in English/secondary education from Welch College.

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